Dana Cionca

Here is what emerged: overload, pressure and internal conflict — invisible, normalized, and too often carried alone.

What keeps women managers awake at night?

1. Overload and constant firefighting

Urgency has become our „default mode”. Time is constantly rushing by, everything feels urgent and important, and we are endlessly putting out fires all around us.

Participants described being constantly pulled into urgent matters, conflicting priorities, and operational tasks, leaving little to no space for long-term strategic thinking — or for themselves. Days filled with back-to-back meetings, endless emails, and last-minute decisions.

During role transitions, the feeling of getting snowed-under is amplified by the pressure to build credibility quickly and manage visibility carefully, while navigating male-defined leadership norms.

Buzzwords centered on urgency – like fast-track completion, operational efficiency or top  priority, push leaders toward speed rather than reflection or clarity.

2. Perfectionism

The drive to do things right, deliver high-quality work and avoid mistakes, often led to delays in decision-making, difficulties delegating, and excessive attention to detail, at the expense of the bigger picture.

Participants shared how this pattern increased their stress levels and made them more hesitant to take visible risks.

Perfectionism, as many respondents experienced it, creates pressure rather than excellence. It narrows perspective and shifts focus from impact to control.

As Salvador Dalí put it: “Have no fear of perfection — you’ll never reach it.”

3. Pressure to deliver results

Another recurring theme was the pressure to deliver immediate results. After spending significant resources to bringing in a top manager, organizations expect fast impact and visible outcomes. Participants shared that this pressure often led them to move into action before fully understanding the context, jumping to quick fixes for the wrong problems.

The predictable result? Poor decisions, misaligned actions, wasted resources — and a lot of frustration.

4. Uncertainty and lack of predictability

Many participants described operating in a constant state of uncertainty, driven by frequent organizational changes, shifting priorities, unclear expectations, and economic volatility. This environment, they shared, made decision-making significantly harder.This uncertainty is amplified when stepping into a new role and there are no clearly defined expectations, priorities or performance indicators. Leaders shared that they often had no idea what success looked like in their new role.

This lack of calibration frequently fuels participants’ anxiety and self-doubt — Am I  focusing on the right things? Will this decision still make sense in three months? What is  really expected of me?

Leading through uncertainty requires emotional resilience, but also early and clear alignment around expectations and what success looks like in the role.

5. Lack of time for self-development

Perhaps one of the most paradoxical findings was this:

Women leaders I spoke with deeply value learning and personal growth — yet they have no time for it. Their strong desire to grow often collides with overloaded schedules, that leave little or no room for reflection, learning or intentional development.

Participants shared that, in onboarding period, the learning phase is quietly skipped, as new leaders are expected to hit the ground running from day one.

This creates frustration, stagnation, and sometimes disengagement — especially for women who are highly driven and growth-oriented.

What women leaders say they need to be effective?

Alongside challenges, I also asked participants what they consider to be essential  leadership qualities.

Here is what they said they need to lead effectively:

1. Vision and strategic thinking

The ability to step back, see the bigger picture, and make sense of where the organization is going are critical.

2. Clear and authentic communication

The ability to communicate expectations clearly, create space for others’ perspective, and adapt messages across stakeholders without losing authenticity.

3. Strong interpersonal skills

Empathy, active listening, emotional intelligence – are leadership fundamentals that build trust, genuine connections, and long-term performance.

4. Decision-making capability

Women leaders want — and need — to make informed and effective decisions with confidence, even when information is incomplete and stakes are high.
      5. Adaptability and flexibility

Finally, the ability to adapt, pivot, and transform obstacles into opportunities is key. Change is not an exception anymore — it is the usual context.

No leadership transition should ever be a solo journey

Leadership transitions are tough, especially for women. Not because of a lack of competence or ambition, but because of the invisible load — the pressure to prove yourself fast, to perform without margin for error, and to adapt while already delivering, often without the space to learn or recalibrate.

If this sounds familiar – and you find yourself awake at 3 a.m., replaying decisions, questioning yourself and carrying the weight of expectations, know this: you don’t have to play this game alone.

Women leaders don’t need more advice or quick fixes. They need space to think, support to integrate, clarity around expectations, and someone in their corner to help them regain perspective, confidence, and direction.

And this is not entirely the leader’s responsibility. Organizations play a critical role in successful transitions, which they will benefit from, after all. Creating the environment for success means allowing time to learn and adapt, aligning expectations and success criteria early on, and providing the right resources — rather than demanding instant impact.

When women leaders are supported through transitions, they don’t just survive change. They grow into stronger, visionary, more effective leaders. Leadership does not have to mean exhaustion.

Ambition does not have to be paid for in the hard-currency of well-being. Confidence is not the absence of doubt — it is the ability to move forward with doubt, when you are properly supported.